Hello everyone, your adorable Chris-chan here~
Tonight I decided to talk about something personal that happened recently. Usually this is not something we encourage- but I believe this is a learning experience for members. It not only teaches you a good lesson, but it could also provide future help if you're ever put into a similar situation with other members or people, or if this user happens to show up suddenly to try to deface me (I already banned them from the Pripara wiki), teach you the trials we Admin have to go through, or it might just give up a little tickle.
Thank you for taking the time to read this wall of text x3
Okay, so about a month or two back a new member joined a wiki I admin and control since the original admin left a few years back (the wiki isn't important, please don't ask). Now usually when new members join a wikia I'm very kind and patient with them- even if they're weird or kind of annoying. This user left me frequent messages on my wall, ranging from random things like "how do you get messages so quickly?!" to "I'm using my phone so my grammar might be messy." only to make a third topic after to say "sorry again".
Now keep in mind this user did the above, TIMES TEN. I have probably 3-5 walls full of nothing but this users annoying messages. I tried to respond to some of them, at least the ones that deserved a response, but I didn't bother with the others. No big deal there. Things weren't bad, but then, a few days ago this mess that inspired the topic happened...
"Can I be an Admin?"
When people ask me that I don't just immediately dismiss them. Not at all. I check their edits and work, I look at their consistancy in edits, how they work with other members, you know the important stuff. I hadn't been on the wiki for a while recently, so I actually didn't know what to think initially. I looked into their edits, and while they weren't the worst, they weren't entirely the best either. The user was annoying, but that played no part in my decision.
Before I told them my answer I decided to take a few days to think it over. Of course, this member ended up repeatedly sending me messages within the span of a day, if that, bringing up "I'll work for hours on the wiki! I really want to be Admin!" "I never won anything before", "This is my dream!"
Keep in mind I'm paraphrasing that a little. There was more but I'll spare you guys the sob stories and repeated messages.
Now, on this particular day I was in a foul mood. So I honestly said "I haven't decided yet but you keep pestering me. This is going to make me want to make you an Admin if you don't give me some space and stop annoying me."
After a few days of silence I finally got another message. In the time I spent thinking it over I decided this member was not going to be a good Admin just yet. Again their edits were average/sub-par, their behavior was kinda weird, they were pestering me and leaving me a million messages, they didn't appear to know how to really do anything except maybe make miniscule edits, and you shouldn't have to prove your worth as an Admin with your pity me words, but what you can do. As I've been busy I really didn't want to leave the wiki in control to someone I didn't exactly know all that much and didn't believe was suited for the role.
You can understand why I didn't select this person as an Admin right? Probably?
As much as I hate to deliver You can't be Admin news, I had no choice. I attempted to explain to this user why, saying "You kind of pester me a lot and don't leave me much thinking time or space. I honestly do not think you're proper Admin material yet and I have to refuse."
Usually people understand. Sometimes they feel a bit sad, but they understand and they decide to fix whatever the issue was or they try to be better members in general.
The user asked me what they could do to sort of redeem themselves to make them suitable for Admin, and I pointed out what had been my concerns, figuring that would be the end of it for the time being, but boy was I wrong. Because next thing I know, the user makes a new message saying "I'm leaving. You won't make me an Admin because of my Autism."
I know what you're thinking, "Wut...?"
Probably because I thought the same thing. This user never mentioned any sort of autism until after I refused their request. Now I admit, I got mad pretty quickly for being accused of having a problem with disability (I have my own issues so I don't judge others for theirs but I'll leave my long medical history out of this. I admit, I might forget it if you tell me you have a mental disability, but I do not judge you for it.) Despite my anger, I simply said "I didn't even do anything, but if you want to storm off and point fingers then go right ahead. I gave you an honest answer."
Of course this escalates. I find the user also called in a friend, claiming I'm so terrible person who needs to get off of their high-horse and accept all members no matter what might be wrong with them if they're willing to help the wiki. DESPITE clarifying I didn't refuse this member because of autism and that I didn't know about it. Both users also went behind my back to complain to the Admin before me (who deactivated their account and hadn't been on the wiki in a few years as I mentioned way earlier on), they both made claims that I rejected the member with bias (due to autism or because they edit using their phone. Yeah that really did happen...) I had no problem telling them they were wasting their time because it was plain to see I didn't do anything wrong, and not only that, but the member wasn't even on the wiki anymore.
But alas, that wasn't it. There was more. The user made a secondary account to harass me, for no real reason because at this point the first wasn't banned. They called me a jerk, they claimed they weren't lashing out yet and I should be lucky (although I really can't think of a better word for what they WERE doing), accused me of being against autistic people, then eventually it escalated into "You're abusing your rights as an Admin, I'm starting my own wiki where everyone is treated good and your a B-word and F-word (they used the actual words mind you)." The user also called in a second friend who insulted my supposed behavior against the autistic.
Of course I'm not intimidated. My wiki for the series is the best and most-popular, and I have plenty of proof that I treated plenty of members good on it. I also wasn't abusing my Admin role in any shape or form just because I said no (You wanna know Admin Abuse? An unactive Admin banned me from a wiki I tried to adopt when I was the only person editing on it and I got no responses from them. I got unbanned because another Admin could tell I didn't do anything wrong, and a few members called the Admin out on it).
From what I know, some autistic people might react the way this user did. But they not only made multiple accounts, they swore on the wiki when it was forbidden, they were also harassing me and not listening. I was within every right to ban them, so yesterday I did. I banned both accounts.
Basically, I'm writing this topic and explaining this annoying little tale for those of you who may think being an Admin is easy. It really isn't. We're only humans, we get mad and upset just like anyone else- so please don't treat us like we can't feel the way you do. Would you guys believe I've had depression since I was 12? I won't say how old I am now, but it's been at least over 10 years I'll tell you that. I was a lonely child whose parents always worked and could barely make time for, and I was afraid of people.
Now that's not to say I didn't have a few friends, but you wouldn't have realized that unless I brought it up, right?
The point is, we Admin have to try to make ourselves functional for the sake of the wiki. We're all prone to the temporary breakdowns just like you guys, but we manage to make ourselves work again too XD
The other point is that PLEASE don't act like a childish brat if you are refused of Adminship. If you honestly feel that the Admin in question is being rude, please then contact another Admin. But keep in mind that just because you ask it doesn't mean you are going to get it. If you're refused please handle it in a calm and orderly manner, and maybe some day you will get to be an Admin or rollback or something.
This user who harassed me thought by treating me poorly they could not only make me reconsider and lower my standards, but they thought they could get away with bullying. To make matters worse, I was reconsidering my decision and considering allowing the member rollback rights at least. But you can bet I'm definitely never letting them back on the wiki period. If they apologize earnestly I might be willing to let them back on, but that is the only exception.
Alright guys, thank you again for reading~