Board Thread:Fun and Games/@comment-3237624-20170920042105/@comment-31328910-20170921154700

I can't wait to show Yume my design for her premium rare dress,Koharu thought happily. "Ko-ha-ru!" Yume said in a sing song voice.

"Yume, I made a design for your dre-" Koharu said, interrupted by Yume.

"Guess what? I made a design for my premium rare dress!" Yume exclaimed, shoving her design in Koharu's face. "

Koharu looked at the design nervously;it looked good but it didn't suit Yume.

"Uh, it looks really pretty," She said, scared of offending Yume.

"Really? Aww, thank you! Oh, weren't you going to say something?," Yume gushed. Koharu shook her head; she wanted to show her design but Yume was so proud of her dress so instead she asked for a favour.

"Sure! Anything for you, Koharu."

Edit: I shortened it as much as I could. Does this work? Or should I make it shorter? FYI,the first line is a thought not someone speaking.